By David Gewirtz
Deadline approaches. The journal goes online in two days. All the articles are submitted and are in first-edit. All the articles but one: my "From the Editor in Chief" column. It hasn't even been written. I could tell you my good excuses: we had lots of great articles, I spring-cleaned my kitchen, I had to brave the supermarket (did you know they have an entire section for veggies?), I shipped a product, I'm thinking about buying a car. Of course, I'm always thinking about buying a car. It's probably a guy-thing.
But the fact is, I just didn't get around to writing anything. When we had our editorial meeting and were reviewing the articles, I said, "I have a bright idea. We have lots of good articles this month. We don't really need the From the Editor-in-Chief column." No joy. Overruled. Being Editor-in-Chief isn't quite as much fun if you get overruled in editorial meetings. Oh well.
So, here it is. My "From the Editor-in-Chief" column in all its sordid glory. Next problem: what to say? I put so much energy into avoiding the work that I don't have a formal outline. After all, didn't we already do the Palm PC, the Palm III, and such to death? After all that excitement, what else is there to talk about? I guess I'll just do some stream-of-consciousness typing and let you know what sorts of things I've been thinking about. Hang on, buckle-up. Here we go.
First topic: What do we call this thing?
We've been calling the device the PalmPilot. But now it's not a Pilot anymore due to some legal goop. Now it's the Palm III. And the device category is called a Palm Computing Platform Device. Yowch! That's a mouthful. "Look honey. I just bought a Palm Computing Platform Device." It just doesn't roll off your tongue.
Our esteemed competitor over at Tap suggests calling the new device a P3. I kind of like that. "Look honey, I just bought a P3." Of course, a P-3 is also the P-3 Orion, a Lockheed-built United States four-turboprop anti-submarine warfare (ASW) and maritime patrol aircraft that can cruise at over 400 miles per hour. That's sure not going to fit in your pocket. (Told you this was stream-of-consciousness!) But now you know something about ASW aircraft.
It is an interesting problem. Even if we use Palm III or P3, it only fits this device, not this class of devices. We'll probably wind up calling them Palm devices or Palm UnPC's. Who knows? I guess we'll have to figure that one out later.
Second topic: Car stuff
My current vehicle is annoying me and I'm staring a big repair bill in the face. Either I trade it in or pay my repair dues. Hence, I'm dreaming of new cars. But, I'm dreading dealing with the car dealers. Even though I'm a darned tough negotiator, I'm just not in the mood to put up with the obligatory dealer B.S. (and no, that's no Boy Scouts or Buy Southern).
